The Re-giftey Dance

My boss is a re-gifter. It’s just terrible. He’s got that academic/eccentric nutty professor thing, but he never invented shit. It would be ok if he had invented Flubber or something useful like that. If you want to know about the economics of Asian paper distribution, he’s your man...but if you need to dunk on Wesley Snipes or Woody Harrelson in a pick-up basketball game, forget about it.

Everything would have been ok, if he had re-gifted us…good gifts. But it is clear why he did not want the tacky wood-carved salad tongs with Japanese aboriginal imagery on them. Or the tacky scarves. Or the pen. Actually, it was a pretty good pen. I took that. But most of the stuff is unlabeled, so even if I could sell it on eBay, what would I say? "Vaguely Japanese looking woood carvings...probably...NO RESERVE BID NOW TOP SELLER WILL NOT LAST”????