Pants Dispenser

Don't steal home without it! Quotes

Saturday, April 29, 2006

The Original Crazy Inventor?

There's this ad running on ABC Family (yeah, I admit it, I was watching Mr. Destiny this afternoon) that advertises Willie Wonka is the original Wild Inventor. Roald Dahl's 1964 novel Charlie and the Chocolate Factory which was the basis for the 1971 film, was a long time ago- but THE ORIGINAL?

Yet, the original Wild Inventor? To say nothing of Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Edison, or George Washington Carver (you like peanut bitter, don't you, you commie?) what about The Absent Minded Professor (1961)! What a bunch of tiny-minded jerks.

Well, maybe the only inventor Gene Wilder ever played, but even that probably won't stand up to scrutiny, either.

Judas Priest Would be Proud of Us (pt. 1)

It was a terrific night. Adventure, friends, discovery, meat and beer. Sure wouldn't;t have been the same without meat and beer.

JGW and I wondered what we were gonna do last night. And drinking and watching deal or no deal or cops could have been fun, but I thought daiquiris on the lawn would have been more fun. Lacking a lawn, we decided to barbecue in the park. Enlisting BN and his friend N, we were on our way by 1pm to having a fun night.

Nevertheless, after picking up some quality ground sirloin and chicken snausages (not going to find quality shit like that in my neighborhood, though the park is pretty spectacular) we were racing against time. By the time the four of us made it into the base of the forest, daylight was fading fast and we still had a bit of a hike to the barbecue pits along the river.

It was past dusk as we walked along the trail, passing a couple of casual walkers, some stray dogs, and some crazy kids who took a nasty spill on a downhill trail when they saw the dogs. Morons.

We arrived at the park on the Hudson, and discovered that there weren't any grills! We had charcoal, we had fire, we had meat. And yet, we decided to push on, Down to the rocks along the river. Mountain Man as always, BN led a major wartime campbuilding exercise, and we created a makeshift grill out of rocks and sticks. To be honest, I was a little freaked out that either the cops would find us, or some paranoid tugboat operator delivering an oil barge up the river would call the department of homeland security on us.

But we beat the odds. We made do in spectacular fashion. And then the magic happened. After opening our first beer of the evening, the Mountain Man had his first of several brilliant MacGyver moments. We cut the top off of the Coors can and cooked the sausages in it! A Dutch oven!

The sausages turned out great. It was dark, but the whole time we had a great view, and we never looked at our watches. We sat out on the rocks, tried not to fall into the river, jumped out of the way of the wake created by the oil barge, all the while completely concealed from view of anyone in the park. It was glorious.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Don't Call it a Comeback!

I been here for years!

Well, actually, I should have done a first anniversary post or something. This makes something like 1 year, one month, of blogging with good ol' Pants Dispenser. Hopefully I won't have to write too many more posts on this shitbag computer. My new laptop should be here soon. MAN! it makes me sriously salivary just thinking about it.

It really does seem like crossroads time, though, you gotta admit. Job transition, seems like I'm finally doing a smart apartment search, but where has my head been?

It just seems like my creative side is suffering big time. So much to think about. So many balls in the air. Geez. And there are some shitty things happening I totally don't fucking need.

So I raise my glass and quote 311: Fuck the naysayers, they don't mean a thing!

Monday, April 03, 2006

Thoughts on the weekend

As I walked out of the office in the early evening of Friday with MH, we saw2 what looked like free beer. It was. Lots and lots of freee beer from the chemistry folks next door.

Dear diary,


Thanks to the dudes from Denmark, Klaus and Klaus, we had an awesome time.